Islam has placed great emphasis on marriage and laid down the duties and responsibilities of both husbands and wives. As Islam aims to achieve a sense of equality and balance in all its affairs in order to avoid unwarranted disputes, it clearly defines the primary rights of husbands and wives in the Holy Quran and Sunnah. Allah says:
وَلَهُنَّ مِثْلُ الَّذِي عَلَيْهِنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَلِلرِّجَالِ عَلَيْهِنَّ دَرَجَةٌ وَاللّهُ عَزِيزٌ حَكُيمٌ
“… Women have rights similar to those of men equitably, although men have a degree of responsibility above them. And Allah is Almighty, All-Wise.” [Al-Baqarah 02:228]
What are the rights of a wife in Islam?
Allah has enjoined husbands a number of obligations towards their partners that they are bound to adhere to without fail. Some of the most basic rights that wives are entitled to are detailed below:
Mahr (dowry)
Allah says in the Holy Quran:
وَ آتُواْ النَّسَاء صَدُقَاتِهِنَّ نِحْلَةً فَإِن طِبْنَ لَكُمْ عَن شَيْءٍ مِّنْهُ نَفْسًا فَكُلُوهُ هَنِيئًا مَّرِيئًا
“Give women you wed their due dowries graciously. But if they waive some of it willingly, then you may enjoy it freely with a clear conscience.” [An-Nisa 04:04]
Mahr is the first and foremost right of a wife. There is no designated sum for mahr, but it should be a reasonable amount. The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) encouraged the Sahaba to give mahr even as little as an iron ring, if that is all that he could afford.
Narrated Sahl bin Sa`d: The Prophet (ﷺ) said to a man, “Marry, even with (a Mahr equal to) an iron ring.” [Bukhari]
Every woman is entitled to receive mahr as it serves as a vital token of honor that Islam reserves for wives. She is free to spend it as she pleases and none, not her father nor her husband, can claim it unless she gives it on her own accord. She also reserves the right to excuse the
Attending to financial needs
وَعلَى الْمَوْلُودِ لَهُ رِزْقُهُنَّ وَكِسْوَتُهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ
“Upon the father is their [i.e., the mothers’] provision and their clothing according to what is acceptable.” [Al-Baqarah 02:233]
It is obligatory upon the husband to look into his wife’s needs and accommodate them to the best of his capabilities. It is incumbent upon every husband to spend on his wife even if she is rich and manages a career of her own. The reason underlying this ruling is that through the signing of the marriage contract she is available only to him and hence her welfare— from food, clothing, accommodation, and all other living expenses, fall under his responsibility. As in the hadeeth below, the Prophet (PBUH) has stated that spending on one’s wife is a charitable act.
Narrated Sa’d bin Abi Waqqas: Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) said, “You will be rewarded for whatever you spend for Allah’s sake even if it were a morsel which you put in your wife’s mouth.” [Sahih Al-Bukhari]
Being treated with love & honor
Abu Hurairah reported: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “The most perfect man in his faith among the believers is the one whose behavior is most excellent; and the best of you are those who are the best to their wives.” [At-Tirmidhi]
Family is the most important component of society and maintaining a good relationship with one’s spouse is a key determinant of a healthy and loving family. Husbands should ensure to utter kind words to their wives, be gentle and respectful towards her, appreciate her efforts, and complement her. As was the practice of the Prophet (PBUH), he should help out with household chores when possible and make it a priority to spend time together with his wife and children.
In the instance of co-wives, this treatment should extend to all his wives equally.
Being treated with kindness and not subjected to harm
During his final sermon, the Prophet (PBUH) said, “fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have right over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner. ” [Sahih Muslim]
It is among the most basic rights of a wife in Islam to not be harmed physically or verbally by one’s husband. Problems are a part of everyday life and should never be an excuse to be violent and hurtful. It is important that a husband maintains leniency and gentleness in his mannerisms. If she does make a mistake, he is expected to be patient and forgiving and refrain from unnecessary strictness.
What are the rights of a husband in Islam?
Just as husbands have a number of key responsibilities to uphold in a Muslim marriage, women too have several basic obligations that need to be fulfilled as detailed in the Quran and Sunnah.
The right to obedience
الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاء بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَى بَعْضٍ وَبِمَا أَنفَقُواْ مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ فَالصَّالِحَاتُ قَانِتَاتٌ حَافِظَاتٌ لِّلْغَيْبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللّهُ
“Men are the protectors and supervisors of women because of the advantage Allah has given some over others and because they support them from their means. Therefore, righteous women are those who are humble and who guard (in their husband’s presence and absence) his rights and secrets, which Allah has ordained to be guarded.” [An-Nisa 04:34 ]
No doubt, a strong partnership between husband and wife is required to run a home smoothly. Of course, women are responsible for maintaining the household and managing her children, but the overall responsibility of overseeing the affairs of the family is placed upon the shoulders of the husband. Men are usually much more rational and seldom make decisions based on momentary emotions—as a result, the overall responsibility of managing the family falls under his domain. Therefore, when faced with the task of making crucial family decisions, the husband’s judgement should be given precedence. However, this does not mean that the husband should exploit his power and make decisions based solely for his benefit; instead, he should consult his wife and make a favorable decision that will benefit the family as a whole.
Physical intimacy
One of the most basic rights of the husband is to have an intimate physical relationship with his wife. It is incumbent upon a wife, after the offering of the mahr, to submit herself to her husband. However, should she require two or three days to compose and prepare herself, her husband should give her that much-needed time. However, as the hadeeth below states, if a wife does refuse intercourse beyond this and as per his desires, it is considered a grave sin, unless she has a valid excuse (such as: obligatory fasts, menstrual cycle, illness, etc.). The cause for this ruling is to ensure that a husband does not seek physical pleasure elsewhere, subjecting himself to sin in the process.
The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “By Him in Whose Hand is my life, when a man calls his wife to his bed, and she does not respond, the One Who is above the heaven becomes displeased with her until he (her husband) becomes pleased with her”. [Al-Bukhari & Muslim]
Avoiding inviting anyone her husband dislikes into their home
Another important right of husbands that have been mentioned repeatedly by the Holy Prophet (PBUH) even during his final sermon was that wives should avoid inviting those who their husbands dislike into their home.
Abu Hurairah reported: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “It is not lawful for a woman to observe (voluntary) fasting without the permission of her husband when he is at home; and she should not allow anyone to enter his house without his permission.” [Al-Bukhari & Muslim]
To be treated with love, respect and kindness
Just as every wife deserves the right to be treated with kindness and respect, husbands too deserve to be treated equally. Wives should ensure that they do not raise their voice to their husbands, make sure their needs are met in time, and that they feel loved and appreciated for the hard work they put into taking good care of the family. If they do make a mistake, they too deserve to be treated with patience and compassion.
Other rights of husbands that wives need to uphold include avoiding leaving home without his permission, protecting his name in front of their children and others, being honest and trustworthy with him, guarding his secrets, and making certain that their offspring are brought up righteously with Islamic values and morals from their early years.
Islam never discriminates and always makes it a priority to treat everyone equally. The rights of husbands and wives that the Quran and Sunnah have dictated are assigned to them taking into consideration the physical and emotional necessities & capabilities of men and women. If these basic rights are exercised as they are meant to, Muslim families today can undoubtedly enjoy marriage as it should be— a union filled with love and tranquility.
